Filipina American Differences

Filipina and American couple have so many differences about many things. In our country, most husband work and report their salary to the “wife” to budget everything while here in America, most couple have different account especially if they have “Ex”. But how do things work on Filipina and American couple? Well things depend on every situation. Let’s tackle about some points of view here also it’s everything that I might say isn’t how it exactly work for other Filipina-American couple.

I heard some story about some Fil-Am couple, mostly for the first 3 to 5 years, most Filipina wife who married an American stays at home as they are new to this country and can’t drive yet. Now let’s go to the expenses… does Filipina women shares in paying bills? From what I heard and know, most Filipina wife does not pay for the bills. Most husbands don’t even bother to check how much their wife earns especially when it’s just an earning from blogging and not really an actual job. That way, Filipina wife have their own money either to save or to buy personal things they want ...Speaking of, I remember before I got here, I already told myself to be conscious or aware of anything with regards money as I am have so much pride that I don't want to hear anything that sounds like I am after to my husbands money. I remember when I wasn't earning yet, when my husband want to eat out, I always said "French fries" from Mcdonalds and not buy anything when we go shopping because I don't want to accused of something... I might sounds defensive or something but I'd rather do that rather than wait to be accused after all I don't need anything much when it comes to clothes as I am still staying at home until I will be able to drive and get a job... But when I started to earn my own money, I bought things I need and want for myself...

Anyway, most of the time, most Filipina send money to their Family in the Philippines as a help.Sending money to a Family in the Philippines is not rare although there are also some Americans who are against it as I heard that in some cases in the news both in the radio and TV when i was still in the Philippines. But the most scary story I heard when I was still in the Philippines was the abusive husband grrr. I also heard some instances where American husbands insured their wife and eventually kill their Filipina wife after few months or years so they can get money. But I think that was just stories long time ago... Because I don't think there are still people who would dare to do such nowadays that technology are getting better where criminals are easily get caught...

A Husband Found Out He Married A Gay...

I can’t blame Gerald Brainard III, an American man from Michigan, USA, for seeking annulment after he found out on the wedding night that the woman he married with “este” man is a gay. Yes Brainard married Lou Vincent Suarez, a Filipino gay whom he met on a dating website in April 2006. There’s nothing wrong about being a gay but I wish Lou Vincent have been honest about it since the very beginning of their communication to avoid any problems.

Gerald Brainard III and Lou Vincent Suarez Gerald Brainard III met on a dating website in April 2006 and often spent hours upon hours talking on the phone and e-mailing each other and after two months with constant long distance communications Brainard flew to the Philippines and tied the knot with Suarez and later, during the wedding night, Brainard found out that Suarez is a gay. Suarez explained everything but still Brainard filed for the nullification of their marriage. Click here to read the whole story...

You May Be Married to a Filipina if . . .

her friends are named Chinky, Girlie, Boy and Bimbo and you are not allowed to smirk.

your refrigerator is always full but you cannot find any food that you recognize.

most of the decorations in your house are made of wicker.

all her relatives think your name is Joe.

your house isn't on fire, but there is a very charred fish right on top of the stove burner.

even the ketchup tastes weird . . . very weird.

you throw a party and everyone is fighting to chop the leathery skin off a dead pig.

all your kids have 4-5 middle names.

your in-laws call you "that white guy."

you try to call her up on the phone and someone tells
you "for a while" and you actually understand what they mean.

she says ate her peer is dareful.... and you actually understand what she means.

she sweeps with something that witches usually fly around on.

the rice cooker is on 24 hours a day and uses up 50% of your electric and food budget.

all her pajamas look like they were worn by the Dalai Lama until they got too faded.

she gets really excited by sucking the fat out of pig knees.

your daughter gets her ears pierced when she's 2 minutes old but your sons are not circumcised until they turn 21.

all your postage bills instantly double.

the only "white meat" she likes is You, and that's if you're lucky . . .

her favorite sauce is called patis, Americans call it turpentine.

she can eat and talk at the same time, in fact that's her specialty!

her favorite meal is leftovers

she goes to the movies just for the AC.

all the vegetables she buys at the Filipino store look like they were grown at Chernobyl.

your in-law's first visit lasted 5 years.

she washes her hair with a bucket and her car with a broom.

she uses an umbrella even if its not raining.

her favorite book (she has 3 copies) is "1001 New Recipes for Pig Parts You Were Gonna Throw Out"

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST: you are pretty proud of
yourself because you think you snagged up for yourself
some unique, rare, tropical goddess type until you go
to the Philippines and can't tell her apart from
anyone else in the whole country (unless she's taller
than 5'1", then it's a bit easier).

Different World Different Procedures...

Today, I have once again experience another difference between American life and Filipino Life. When I woke up this morning, my husband told me that he needs to go to the emergency room in the city hospital this morning because his back pain is not getting any better. The doctor in the clinic yesterday told him that if the pain won't go away with the medicine she gave him, he should go to the emergency to get further test that there clinic don't have.

And so we did this morning... I have been in the emergency room before when we were visited my father in law in Harris Methodist Hospital which is bigger than the city hospital. Anyway, first thing that came into my mind when hubby said he needs to go to the emergency was that he is just going to have blood test, urine samples and x-tray.

I got scared when the nurse told hubby to change into hospital dress for I didn’t expect it. I thought they are just going to do simple procedures… Anyway, I got more scared when the doctor told us that they will be giving him IV, dextrose, pain medicine and get some blood sample from him. They also did ECG, X-ray, give him contrast drink for CAT Scan etc etc etc... That's the emergency here... Isn't it so much different from us? Well to be honest I really don't know exactly what our emergency room in the Philippines look like because "pwera buyag" I haven't been in the hospital because I am sick or something...

I have been hoping and praying that there's no major problem at all. Thanks God doctor said everything is negative. Hubby just have a muscle spasm at the lower part of the back. They give him muscle pain medicine so hopefully hubby's back will quit hurting soon...

Comparison Between Fil and Westerners

***Are Filipino guys more traditional? If so, does that mean their values are more intact than that of foreigners?


The values of each individual can’t be determined from which country you are from. It’s is something acquired from the time you’re inside your mom’s womb up to the time you were raised. The emotions of a mother while she’s pregnant create a big impact to the baby. Plus the environment of where you were raised and people that surrounds you.. So I strongly believed that each person have different individuality no matter what race you are.


***Is the stereotype true that Westerners have a less of a sense of spirituality? What about a foreigner's view of commitment in a relationship?


It’s not true for I have seen a lot of spiritual foreigners. And relationship wise, I think it’s something to do with the culture, the individuality of a person, their sets of mind and the standard of living they wished for. We can never foretell what’s going to happened in a relationship neither a Filipino nor Americans. As we all know, some country have Divorced and some have not. But come to think of it, there might be no Divorced in the Philippines but there’s Annulment and there are a lot of separations. So it’s solely depends on the person involved rather than the nationality.


***How are they as mates- is they jealous, possessive?

My husband is a foreigner and as normal person as I am. I believe that other individuals and couples just normally feel every emotion we share. And jealousy is normal as well, it depends on how you manage and how both partner handle the situation.

***Is it true that normally a stronger woman is better off with a foreigner?

Some people said so, I have a friend that said she wanted to marry a foreigner because she is strong enough that she think if she will have Filipino husband, he will be “under de saya” which she don’t like to happened. But I think it’s how a couple talk and how open they are between each other.

Living Like A King In The Philippines

Philippines is a nice country with rich natural resources that if only the government will use it for the Filipino instead of corrupting it, I am sure that Philippines will be as successful as other countries. Anyway the reason why I talk about my beloved country today is because of the article I read this morning.

A 60 year old American man said that he is living like a king in the Philippines because of the kindness of the people. Which I do agree because Filipino people are known from being very hospitable, friendly, respectful, and kind. He also said that his small income is a fortune in the Philippines. Why not? a $1,000 is equivalent to 56,000 pesos, those time when a dollar was 56 pesos which I am sure the time he wrote those article I read. But even now that the dollar depreciates, a thousand dollar is still a lot in the Philippines. It is 40,000 pesos right now if I am not mistaken.

As he continues, he said that in the states at fifty years old, he was treated like an old man which he admit he was. No one smiled at him and not many cared. Nor he smile back or cared. But with the surroundings in the Philippines that have friendly and with kind people, he felt there is little empathy and concern for others in Filipino people as he compared to the States, most western countries and even to some Asian countries.

Pinay American Baby

This is our very dear Baby Girl Jadyn, daughter of Mommy Anne. All her tita's and her mommy were having fun taking pictures of her everything we go out and do things together. Before, it was only the three of us... Anne, Te Rose and I do things together, took pictures of each other, dine out, shopping etc... but now, since Jadyn arrived... things gets more fun as we enjoy taking picture with her, playing with her and talking with her kahit walang sagot heheheeh... she actually response by smiling and making faces with us... isn't that cute? Her cutie and wonderful smile was the best response you could ever get from her, Mommy Anne's Pinay American Baby Jadyn...

One of Fil-Am Differences

This post is to show one among so many differences of being a Filipina and American. Two different individual from different countries bound and become one through marriage. Look at the expressions of two faces, A pinay who is so happy to finally found the “Dried Fish” area in Hongkong Market and an American who feels yucky to touch and smell “Dried Fish” hahahahah……

Learning to Communicate

I know that Filipina and American relationships mostly having some problem with regards to communicating with their partner. There will be times when a husband or wife become exasperated because they cannot successfully convey their emotional needs, opinions, or desires to their spouses. I know some Filipina who said that when she get so frustrated arguing with her husband, balikason nalang niya using bisaya or tagalong words.

Girls I have some funny sentences about Filipina and American that I got somewhere. Here it goes:

1. You girlfriend breaks into tears and her older brother, Bong-Bong, appear with a large knife that he waves at you menacingly,
2. Your girlfriend looks suddenly confused, and her brother Bong-Bong smiles and winks at you while rubbing a hand across his chest.

Most Filipinas speak English well but sometimes having problem with their vocabulary and trouble with tenses (past, present, future) and sentence structures.

The vocabulary limitation is usually patched with the ever-present Tagalog word, "ano" (the a is pronounced as it would be in "father" and the emphasis is on the first syllable). "Ano" means, technically, "thingamajig," or, for you college types, "whatchamacallit." A Tagalog speaker will usually use the term "ano" when they do not know the English word for something. Examples:
"I need to go work on the ano."
"Where is the ano?"
"Ano?" ("What?")
"Can you take me to the ano?"
"Honey, we need to ano the ano."

American Husband’s mission is to figure out what the "ano" is. If your wife says, "Honey, we need to buy an ano for the bathroom," you have to figure out what exactly it is that your bathroom needs. Toilet paper, a rug, a shower curtain, a blow torch?


"Ano" can also be used when modesty requires it to be used...as when identifying, for example, sexual organs. You have an ano, she has an ano, animals have anos, bees have anos...you get the idea.

Are you in a romantic setting, or in a fabric store, for example? If your girlfriend or wife says, "The ano is too long, we need to cut it," this becomes a very critical question, don't you think?

Filipino American Marriage

I got this article from http://www.livinginthephilippines.com I got interested on reading it and would like to share this to all my friends.


Written by a foreigner who get married with a FILIPINA

Hi, I had a similar experience with my .....ex........Filipina wife. I call it the "sup to u, sup to me" syndrome. When I met her here in Cebu about 9 years ago she was as sweet as could be. Anyone meeting her would say she would be a great bet for a wife and many people did say that and I thought so also. Everything we did was always my decision. Where shall we go today Hon "sup to you" what would you like to order off the menu "sup to you", what movie would you like to watch? "sup to you" on and on, everything sup to you.

Then I brought her back to Alaska on a fiancée visa and married her and we had a son and then any decision from that point on was "sup to me"! She was, and still is a good girl in most ways, never drank or smoked or used drugs, didn't cheat etc etc but she turned out to be the most hard headed, obdurate, intractable woman I have ever known in my life! She became acquainted with a lot of other Filipina Americans who quickly let her in on the situation in America..."you don't have to listen to him any more, just do what you want." She knew from the start that I wanted to live here in the PI and planned to balikbayan for a few years b4 retiring completely here, but once she got to the states she just stubbornly refused to return to the PI under any circumstances. She was completely beyond persuasion and in fact wouldn't even listen to any of my reasoning, just continually said NO! (SUP TO ME)

So don't anyone count on the sweet loving faithful Filipina wife returning to live here. Some do but many don't. I still have a hard time grasping the change in her attitude. Now we are in a messy argument about my visitation with my son...another topic! I'm re-married here in Cebu and will in no circumstance take my new wife to the states, even though she does hound me about it occasionally.

She knew exactly my thoughts on the subject when we were married. I love life in the Philippines and intend to stay here and keep my wife a sweet Filipina here in this country. I've seen and heard of too many Filipinas who became Americana diretcho when they got off the plane. I could have found a woman like that without leaving the states if that's what I wanted.

Good luck to all, they do make good wives, even in the states as long as you are willing to be submissive to their will and live in the U.S. SUP TO YOU, SUP TO HER.........


How to tell if your Net girlfriend is scamming you. One of the livinginthephilippines3 members said;

One of the List resource people wrote to a List guest the following, a foreigner who was having second thoughts about marrying a Guest Relationship Officer, (GRO) his girlfriend and fiancée he met in a bar/karaoke.

John wrote:

So you have fallen into the trap by meeting a gorgeous, shy little GRO, and you feel at this moment that you want to marry her. OK, but first let me tell you a little story.

I ran a girlie bar in Manila for just over 5 years. I soon found out the ground rules, and although I didn't approve of them, they were the rules.

Girls were bought from their parents in the provinces for as little as P2000.00, we went on regular shopping trips and I found the whole thing distasteful but that was how it was done.

They traveled back to Manila on the bus, while we came back in a chauffeur driven limo. As soon as they arrived, the teaching process began. Most of the teaching was done by the senior GRO's or more experienced girls at the bar.


The No. 1 Rule is that you are no longer free, you have been purchased by the boss and your parents have been rewarded, do not let your parents down! You are not allowed to go out without written permission from your boss or when you are bar-fined, but then you must arrange this with the Head Geisha.

You belong to the Boss as if you are married to him. You are not allowed to have a personal boyfriend. Every male is your boyfriend, but only if they pay your bar-fine. If you are bar-fined, you must be back on these premises by Noon the following day. If you are late you will be fined and the money will be taken from your salary.

After these ground rules were learnt, the girls settled in and were taught how to please a male by dancing, flirting, massage, and sex. At first I thought I was in paradise with a line of 18 year olds queuing up out side my bedroom door.

But the novelty soon wore off, believe me. The quiet girls were taught that shyness was a tool they could use,
because loads of guys are turned on by the sexy little shy one. She acts like the virgin and the little girl lost.

Do not let this fool you. She, like all the others, are in this business to make money for the bar, the object of the exercise is to get the guy to buy loads of ladies drinks and then Bar-fine as many girls as he can handle. All the tricks in the book are used to get the cash out of your pocket and into the till.

Girls under the age of 21 are not allowed to drink alcohol, so if you ply her with drink and take her out, you could get into trouble with the Police, that's if somebody reports you. Big heavy fine, and money all around for the corrupt police and their informers.

Another thing is that if you are dating your girlfriend without paying a bar-fine, she will get into serious trouble with her boss, and you will probably be taught a little lesson by a few heavies that creep up on you from nowhere. I know. I have woken up a few times in the rat infested gutter, with my nose out of joint, all because of a shy little GRO.

OK you think you love her and want to marry her. You say you are 45. By the time she is 25 and at her sexual peak, you will be in your 50's. She will go back to the bar, she will want to show off to her old friends that she is now all grown up, and she has her old husband paying for everything she wants in life. Plus he is paying for everything her parents want....and the sisters and brothers... and the 500 or so cousins that are waiting in line for their share.

She will see the girls in her old place of work, having a good time with the punters, while all she has to look forward to that day is a pile of washing and ironing. She will be very tempted to have just one drink with an old flame and listen to his drunken promises. She will probably take him to a short time hotel and earn some extra
housekeeping by just laying on her back for an hour or so. Eventually you will get suspicious, the rows will start, She will go back to work in the bar. The end!


Sorry mate, there are hundreds of thousands of gorgeous decent Filipino girls in this world, all looking for the man of their dreams, and all wanting to settle down, start a family and live Happily Ever After. You are a little bit like myself. I too fell in love with a GRO, but a good friend warned me of the dangers, I lived
with her for a couple of years and we had some great times, but she would always go back to the bar to see her friends once a week, then twice a week, making excuses, coming home at 4 in the morning, drunk
and clothes torn. Then into Shabu [methamphetamine, speed, crank.] Bye bye little shy GRO. Now probably dead.

It will be hard to make the break, but you must. Remain good friends but please don't marry her. Because she is already married...TO THE BAR

By JOHN HARMAN. 3-21-05 by permission

There is a saying, "You can take the girl out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the girl." I believe this is true most of the time, certainly from what I have seen in the past 15 years. There are exceptions, but rare. The bar is exciting. Provincial girls become idols of customers, stars in their own eyes, make tight friendships in the bars. But some girls find a boyfriend before they get hung up with the life. But that is rare. There is usually always some problem that brought them to this, in addition to poverty, they can't shake.